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標題: 老婆是个白领 [打印本頁]

作者: hcs 時間: 2010-8-3 07:47 AM 標題: 老婆是个白领

老婆是个白领，每天打扮的端庄优雅的去上班。在人前，举止得体。偶尔听到粗俗的笑话，脸还会红，一副温良恭谦让的良家女子相。可是私下，不论是在家中还是在公众处，她的那一副“色”相，真是原形毕露。
比如，找几件她的小劣迹：

1、我的上班时间比她早，总是在8：00时打电话叫醒她，久打，不接。最后，终于听到她嗲嗲的：“喂——”,先听到她对着电话吹气，然后说：“手机的震动……好舒服……哟，可惜没防水功能……黄河都泛滥喽……”接着是她的笑。

2、临近中午，打电话问她忙什么，答曰：“很忙，”“锄禾日当午呀，汗滴禾下土。”听到她的狂笑，才知她又在心术不正了。她经常会钻到我怀里问：“你叫锄禾吧，谁叫当午呀？”

3、正聚精会神的看电视上丰胸广告中的美女，她听到声音，从电脑前冲过来，跳着脱衣艳舞，除掉上衣，用比广告中更撩人的姿势秀她的小酥胸。广告停止，她又倏地钻到电脑前，一本正经。

4、拿一枚硬币，蹭过来，贼兮兮的说：“我教你一招调戏女同事的把戏。”她用手指夹好硬币，说：“我问你问题，你抽出硬币后再回答。”第一个问题：“你今年多大？”

我从她的指缝抽出硬币，回答。

第二个问题，也是如此。

最后问：“你的洞房夜老公和你说的第一句话是什么？”我使劲抽也抽不出硬币，她用两只手的力量捏紧，不让我抽出硬币，我于是说：“你夹的太紧了，我拔不出。”说完，她就狂笑。大叫成功。问我学会了没有。

5、夜吃方便面，她煮好，卧上三个荷包蛋，一根香肠。她作出流哈拉子样的看着我：“你就一根肠两个蛋，还有一个应该是我的。”一看到她又坏笑，喷饭。

6、一起走在路上，她总是用手拉着我的长裤的后腰。我说不舒服，让她松开，她就是一本正经的说：“谁让你的柄儿长前面，不长后面呢”，“我没什么拉，只能拉这里啦。”

7、写着字，她突然用笔支起下巴，认真的问我：“那个，那个‘咬’字怎么写来着？”我老实回答她，“就是‘ 口交’呗”。她一笑，又知她的阴谋得逞了。

8、心情不好时，对她粗声大气。她装作委屈的样子，眨着眼睛说：“公牛出差，不放心母牛一人在家，就把它送到好友大象那里，公牛回来后领母牛回去后，惊讶的说‘咦，牛B大了呀！”然后，她再说：“就是你！”

先弄这些..有时间在加!~笑过之余..给你门做个测试...我发现.看完我帖子的有两种人...

第1种:看完了我的帖子笑了的人.......这种人,爱情顺利,事业顺心,家庭和睦,福如东海.寿比南山,一生开心~

当然了。.这种人也都宽宏大量....不会介意回个小小的帖子了...开心无价嘛~~

第2种:看完了我的帖子没有笑的人:........这种、人........................啥也别说了..............没的说了

作者: wxhzzq 時間: 2010-8-7 02:05 AM 標題: ding

作者: hong8848 時間: 2010-8-8 04:27 PM

作者: 576284619 時間: 2010-8-9 12:28 PM 標題: 回復 #1 hcs 的帖子

..

作者: 77303399 時間: 2010-8-11 05:05 AM

1

作者: bingying 時間: 2010-9-25 11:21 AM

不赖.

作者: ch6300346 時間: 2010-9-25 11:35 AM

作者: vwxy074 時間: 2010-9-26 07:03 AM 標題: 人言可畏啊！

說的不錯，說到我心?去了頂下！！！

天龍八部2外掛 qq三國外掛 神魔大陸外掛 天龍八部2外掛 龍之穀外掛

作者: kingjust 時間: 2010-9-27 10:02 AM

作者: haodifang 時間: 2010-9-28 06:43 AM 標題: 回復 #1 hcs 的帖子

这个很不错值得

作者: hy775 時間: 2010-9-28 11:52 AM

作者: thomas1984 時間: 2010-11-2 06:07 AM

感謝分享，很有意思，收藏了。

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作者: lixiangshi0 時間: 2010-11-2 12:09 PM

作者: zhanghaitaotao 時間: 2010-12-31 02:27 PM

作者: zgpa15532 時間: 2011-1-1 12:58 PM

作者: bu8503 時間: 2011-1-8 12:45 AM 標題: ?理全??算机3??★加QQ66698208★

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作者: bu8503 時間: 2011-1-8 05:36 AM 標題: ??家??算机1??★加QQ66698208★

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作者: vtdkoghn 時間: 2011-1-11 10:30 AM 標題: 身份?掉了怎么?★加QQ：66698208★

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作者: vtdkoghn 時間: 2011-1-12 07:48 AM 標題: ?身份?★加QQ：66698208★

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作者: 隸釋剿辿潑薊 時間: 2011-1-13 03:14 AM 標題: ???士???★加QQ57269887★

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作者: ym230 時間: 2011-1-13 10:20 AM

作者: 隸釋剿辿潑薊 時間: 2011-1-15 10:54 AM 標題: 万?代?身份?公章qq57269887

万?代?身份?公章qq57269887

福路公司代?各种?件刻章?牌,?到付款,qq57269887

?到付款,??面?全?（支持支付?交易）

代?万?身份?公章qq57269887

福路公司的?理??主要有以下几种：

1.代?各?校各??????,自考??，成人高考，?考??，涵授，英?六???，?算机等???及各??案等.

2.代?各?中?高??格?，如中????，高?工程??等等

3.代?各种防?身份?，?口本香港身份?，?婚?，离婚?，?官?,房??，???照等等

4.代????，行??，小??牌，客??牌，???牌，武警?牌等等

5.万?代?身份?公章qq57269887等等

6.代?政府机?公章，企?公章，??公章及??外一切?件等等

作者: cxchenjian 時間: 2011-1-16 06:22 AM

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作者: sa2885000 時間: 2011-1-20 06:17 PM

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作者: yxdyxd09 時間: 2011-1-29 11:05 PM

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顶

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作者: 667488 時間: 2011-4-29 10:55 AM 標題: 回復 #1 hcs 的帖子

作者: xj870807 時間: 2011-5-2 03:28 AM

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好啊

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好笑

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作者: bornbaby 時間: 2012-6-4 12:14 AM

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作者: wawapiwawa 時間: 2012-7-30 05:33 AM 標題: su

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作者: aqlou 時間: 2012-11-8 11:19 PM

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作者: jiangyiwen 時間: 2012-12-17 09:36 AM

呵呵

作者: jedah 時間: 2013-1-10 04:40 PM

笑了

作者: pcbaihu 時間: 2013-5-26 01:43 AM

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作者: 隸嫉 時間: 2013-9-11 06:15 PM 標題: 英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887????????????????????????????

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英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??英?六???失怎么?Q.57269887??
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作者: 531761381 時間: 2014-4-4 01:12 AM

作者: luckday 時間: 2014-5-4 02:03 AM

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